I’ve just come back from my evening stroll around Century Park. It’s a magnificent place to walk in the evenings as it’s rather quiet, except for some joggers and some couples. One thing I couldn’t help noticing recently has been a very high incidence of couples around here doing the piggybacking thing.
They do it a lot. Piggybacks all over the place. I see it almost every evening. Why? What the hell is going on here? I’m stumped. It seems to occur at the stage slightly beyond hand-holding, but slightly short of anything else. And they love it. They do it with tremendous gusto. Actually, no. It appears to be almost always initiated by the girl, so maybe it’s just the girls who love it.
I can’t figure it out. Could there be some deeper significance behind the piggyback? I’m not one to speculate on these matters but let’s face it - this stuff is metaphorical dynamite. Could it be his way of saying “I’ll bear any burden for you.” Or is it her way of saying, “We do the deed, we get married, and after that, I’m on your back for the rest of your life“?
If you know the answer let us know.
Ken Carroll
Could be:
1. “Carry me now, and later I’ll give you a foot massage” or
2. The same reason girls like ma3
I think it’s something far more mundane: the fad.
I would place it in this range…please have this checked with the academic staff. I nominate a podcast somehow tangentally related to all this.
Hand-holding
Piggy-back
Holding her purse
Washing her feet
Handing her your savings passbook
There’s a Korean movie, it’s something translated like “Strong Gal, or Crazy Gal” or something like that. Anyway it’s about a very strong-willed young woman who also happens to be a knockout. Anyway, eventually the guy professes his love for her. So she smacks him.
She forces him to profess his love thru sheer torture. In one scene she has him wear her heels and carry her. Ahh-yes spring is in the air.
I think it does all have to do with carrying the burden thru life. Although it’s rite of young love, it’s also seen in movies where the young man or even woman carries their aged grandmother or grandfather on their backs. Add falling snow and generally more ‘tong ku’ and you have an epic Chinese movie.
At the risk of sounding sexist (just imagine!)I think gender roles in China are what we might call ‘traditional’. There isn’t the same debate that you would hear in the west. The man is expected to show a willingness to take a kind of stoic responsibility, as possibly examplified by the piggyback! Shanghainese women are not renowned for that particular quality (though they have many, many, many other positive qualities!)
Ken Carroll
Ken
Call me romantic but my wife just came from America. She can ride side saddle on my bike or let me carry her piggy back. If it doesn’t make her feel good it will me.
Mike in Jubei
btw : I don’t know how I entered it first into the “listening blog”
Mike, you’re a romantic.
There is something slightly weird going on on the blog software. I’m having the experts look into it…
Ken
Interesting graphic above, glad the context made it clear - context being so important with all things Chinese! Maybe western women are too heavy for their men to be lifting them. Usually, in the West, this sort of behaviour comes out when people are drinking at the beach or outdoors. Perhaps it is a kind of foreplay whereby the guy can get sweaty from the exertion and the girl gets excited from the risk that she might fall.
Interestingly, the record for women’s weightlifting is held by a Chinese woman, Gonhong Tang who lifted 182.5 Kg
BTW, (Wikipedia) - “The heaviest snatch of all time, 216kg, is owned by Antonio Krastev of Bulgaria” What a guy! what was that I was saying about context?
Ed
As anyone who has spent any time with the Shanghaiese know, there are few places on Earth where the woman plays a more dominating role in a relationship. If I had to proffer an explanation, I would lean to a mix of the following two: (1) It is flirtatious and allows innocent contact in a culture that is not big on public displays of affection and (2) It does seem possible that it is part and parcel of the dominant positioning that the female will hold over the male in their relationship. If it were in the west, I would say it is the male showing off for her and others so maybe that is going on here too.
Hey, Lantian! The movie that you’re talking about is called “My Sassy Girl,” and it’s awesome! They’re already in the process of remaking it for an American audience. I don’t have high hopes for the remake (much in the way that they butchered “Il Mare” by turning it into “The Lake House”).
Robespierre,
I think I agree that women wear the pants in Shanghai, or perhaops as Dennis Thatcher said about his wife “I wear the pants around here. I also iron and press them.” I think it is a bit mixed up, though. On one hand Shanghainese women are powerful, even aggressive, but on the other, they like to play the hyper-sensitive, girlish role. Gosh, this is confusing.
SH girls are indeed confusing. It is hard to generalize (of course) but I have seen some of the most hilariously aggressive hyper-sensitive, girlishness ever. In other words girl “A” is hurt or bothered by something painfully stupid, but I guess she read somewhere that the best defense is a good offense because boy is Boy “A” gonna suffer now. For me the SH female stereotype exists just because of the sheer number of young women who behave this way. Maybe 5-10% of American girls are like that — you find it everywhere. But in SH it seems like it is twice or three times that. I have an acquaintance who made me laugh so hard I was tearing as I listened to her go back and forth on her cell phone between her boyfriend and business calls (real estate). She would calmly conduct business and then switch back to the boyfriend and IMMEDIATELY pick up where her harangue had left off. The disconnect between the sweet business voice and the ferocity of the boyfriend voice was simply indescribable. I have never seen anything like it. If I had seen it on a movie screen, I would have arguesd that no one on the planet behaves like that.
sorry but SH girls have a reputation all over China, as being control freaks , and being prone to “me first , stuff every one else” syndrome, to the point of them being really nasty and underhand about it.
There are a lot of chinese private jokes,(marry a SH girl and become a house husband) and one of the first things you will find ,when you really get into the culture and get a group of men together, there is usually a general discussion about the attributes of SH girls.
The behavior behind “piggybacking” is quite clear if one analyzes it from a Freudian psycho-sexual viewpoint. Repressed sexaulaity in conservative / traditional societies often emerges in these kind of symbolic displays. Then again, sometimes a cigar is really just a cigar. Although there are plenty of buildings in Shanghai that have phallic significance.
I don’t know why, but i saw many guys and girl who enjoy from giving piggyback ride ,all the time!
maybe they think they are child again!
I don’t know “why”,realy!
I think I’m enjoy too!